In our rapidly changing world, connecting with Generation Z can often feel like navigating uncharted waters. These young adults, born between 1997 and 2012, are growing up in a unique socio-cultural landscape shaped by technology, social media, and unprecedented global events.
As a result, understanding their feelings and emotions requires a thoughtful and empathetic approach. Drawing from Young Life’s The RELATE Project, here are some key insights and strategies to help you connect with and support the young adults in your life:
The Masks of Smiles: Acknowledge Hidden Heartaches
Generation Z is often characterized by their ability to put on a brave face, even when they are struggling inside. Smiles can mask deep feelings of heartache. It’s crucial to recognize that their outward appearance might not always reflect their inner emotional state.
Engaging in meaningful conversations can help them sort out their feelings. Assure them that experiencing a mix of emotions — happiness, fear, anxiety — is completely normal. Avoid dismissing their feelings as “just a stage.” Acknowledge the legitimacy of their sense of loss and remind them that negative feelings are appropriate given the circumstances.
Building Resilience Through Transitions
Transitions, whether from school to college, changing jobs, or moving to a new place, can be particularly challenging. Feelings of loneliness may arise before, during, or after these transitions. Brainstorm with them concrete ways to forge new connections — joining clubs, engaging in social groups, or seeking out new work environments.
Encourage curiosity about new people and set achievable goals, such as learning one new name or having a five-minute conversation with someone new. Remind them that it takes time to build new relationships and that mixed feelings during this period are entirely normal.
Deepening Relationships Through Active Listening
Strengthening your relationship with a young adult involves practicing “really listening.” Before offering advice or assuming you understand their experience, take a moment to pause and ask more questions.
Here are some questions to guide your conversations:
- “Tell me more about that.”
- “Is there anything else?”
- “What were you doing as this was happening?”
- “How did you feel about what was going on?”
These questions help acknowledge their feelings and thoughts as important. Be careful to ensure your questions don’t feel like an interrogation. Use empathetic responses such as, “That must be really hard,” or “You must be proud of yourself,” to validate their experiences.
Once you have truly understood their perspective, consider sharing a similar experience from your own life if appropriate. Be honest and vulnerable about your feelings and how the experience changed you. Ask if they have ever felt the same way and listen to their response. Remember, be quick to listen and slow to speak.
The Importance of Quality Relationships
For Generation Z, the quality of relationships often outweighs the quantity. While having many people in their lives can be beneficial, having a non-family-member adult who genuinely listens can make a significant difference. Young adults with fewer but deeper relationships tend to feel more secure compared to those with many superficial connections.
Helping Gen Z Feel Like They Belong
Feeling a sense of belonging is crucial for adolescents. Instead of dismissing their feelings as typical teenage angst, ask what would help them feel more included. Use this as an opportunity to understand their hearts and minds better. Encourage them to consider other kids who might also feel left out and brainstorm ways they can be a friend or improve the environment to foster inclusivity.
This approach not only helps them feel seen and loved but also empowers them to make a positive impact, fostering empathy and resilience.
Connecting with Generation Z requires patience, empathy, and genuine curiosity. By acknowledging their feelings, actively listening, and encouraging meaningful connections, we can help them navigate their complex emotional landscapes.
Together, we can help them build the resilience needed to thrive in today’s world.
To learn more about Young Life’s research on Generation Z and Gen Alpha, and to download your own copy of The RELATE Project report, click here.
To become one of the thousands of trusted adults in Young Life’s volunteer network, or to find out how to connect with Young Life in your area, click here!
